There's a lot I agree with in what you wrote, and some that I disagree with as well. Personally, I'm fairly certain that I understand the truth that underlies all existence. This truth can be expressed in a statement that embraces and extends the truths in all other worldviews, and perhaps extinguishes them as well: Until proven otherwise, this is all one big joke. The only way to lose is by allowing the Universe to troll you by taking it too seriously.